zambezi
September 11th, 2005, 12:37 AM
1. Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the
batteries are getting weak?
2. Why do banks charge a fee on insufficient funds when they already
know you're broke?
3. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion
stars, yet double-check when you say the paint is wet?
4 . Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
5. Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection (and along those same lines, why won't any state execute a person who is ill?
6. Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
7. Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
8. Whose idea was it to put an 's' in the word lisp?
9. If people evolved from apes, how come there are still apes?
10. Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles
are always white?
11. Is there ever a day when mattresses are not on sale?
12. Why do people run over a string a dozen times with their vacuum
cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it and put it down, and
give the vacuum one more chance?
13. Why won't a plastic bag ever open from the first end you try?
14. How do those dead bugs get inside an enclosed light fixture?
15. How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And, finally...the statistics on sanity tell us that one out of
every four persons suffers from some sort of mental illness.
Consider your three best friends: if they're okay, then it's you.
batteries are getting weak?
2. Why do banks charge a fee on insufficient funds when they already
know you're broke?
3. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion
stars, yet double-check when you say the paint is wet?
4 . Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
5. Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection (and along those same lines, why won't any state execute a person who is ill?
6. Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
7. Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
8. Whose idea was it to put an 's' in the word lisp?
9. If people evolved from apes, how come there are still apes?
10. Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles
are always white?
11. Is there ever a day when mattresses are not on sale?
12. Why do people run over a string a dozen times with their vacuum
cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it and put it down, and
give the vacuum one more chance?
13. Why won't a plastic bag ever open from the first end you try?
14. How do those dead bugs get inside an enclosed light fixture?
15. How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And, finally...the statistics on sanity tell us that one out of
every four persons suffers from some sort of mental illness.
Consider your three best friends: if they're okay, then it's you.