Farawla
February 16th, 2004, 09:00 PM
1.A middle aged woman has a heart attack and is taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, she has a near death experience.
During that experience, she sees God and asks if this is it. God says, "No," and explains that she has another 30-40 years to live.
Upon recovery, the woman decided to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc., She even had someone come in and change her hair color. She figured since she's got another 30 or 40 years, she might as well make the most of it.
The woman walked out of the hospital after the last operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital.
She arrived in front of God and stated, "I thought you said I had another 30-40 years."
God replied, "I didn't recognize you."
2.A man is sitting in a bar when an absolutely stunning woman walks in. She is so beautiful he can't take his eyes off of her. She notices this and walks directly over to him. He apologizes for being rude and staring, but she leans over and says that for $100 she will do anything he would like, but he must state it in just three words.
The man looks longingly at her, reaches into his pocket and peels off five $20 bills.
He leans over to her and whispers in her ear "Paint my house."
During that experience, she sees God and asks if this is it. God says, "No," and explains that she has another 30-40 years to live.
Upon recovery, the woman decided to just stay in the hospital and have a face lift, liposuction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc., She even had someone come in and change her hair color. She figured since she's got another 30 or 40 years, she might as well make the most of it.
The woman walked out of the hospital after the last operation and was killed by an ambulance speeding up to the hospital.
She arrived in front of God and stated, "I thought you said I had another 30-40 years."
God replied, "I didn't recognize you."
2.A man is sitting in a bar when an absolutely stunning woman walks in. She is so beautiful he can't take his eyes off of her. She notices this and walks directly over to him. He apologizes for being rude and staring, but she leans over and says that for $100 she will do anything he would like, but he must state it in just three words.
The man looks longingly at her, reaches into his pocket and peels off five $20 bills.
He leans over to her and whispers in her ear "Paint my house."