Leo
March 23rd, 2004, 08:51 AM
A WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST:
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding
items the woman wished
to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed
a remote control for
a television set in her purse. "So, do you always
carry your TV remote?" I
asked. "No," she replied, "but my husband refused
to come shopping with
me,so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I
could do to him."
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never
understand how you
can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper
thigh, rip the hair out by
the root, and still be afraid of a spider.
PHARMACY
A woman walks into a pharmacy and asks the
pharmacist for some arsenic.
He asks "What for?" She says "I want to kill my
husband. He says "Sorry,
I can't do that." She then reaches into her handbag
and pulls out a photo
of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife and
hands it to him.
He says, "You didn't tell me you had a prescription..."
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding
items the woman wished
to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed
a remote control for
a television set in her purse. "So, do you always
carry your TV remote?" I
asked. "No," she replied, "but my husband refused
to come shopping with
me,so I figured this was the most legal evil thing I
could do to him."
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never
understand how you
can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper
thigh, rip the hair out by
the root, and still be afraid of a spider.
PHARMACY
A woman walks into a pharmacy and asks the
pharmacist for some arsenic.
He asks "What for?" She says "I want to kill my
husband. He says "Sorry,
I can't do that." She then reaches into her handbag
and pulls out a photo
of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife and
hands it to him.
He says, "You didn't tell me you had a prescription..."